...I'm a girl again. So why does it still hurt?


Being a boy is painful. So is losing at Quidditch.

...Eeto, Captain? How do I sit on my broom? It hurts....

This village in which I find myself is most vexing. I fear I've wandered far from mine township.

Prithy thee, but would that someone were so kind as to direct me to the nearest chapel? I've witnessed many signs of evil doings of late, and I fear for the safety of my soul.



[[Osaka has been misplaced in the 1690s, a decade that saw several events of interest, including, oh, the Salem Witch Trials? Expect Osaka to be deathly afraid of witches. (Good place to be then, eh? XD)]]

Excuse me, but is anyone out there a mermaid? Oh, students, I mean, not professors. Any mermaid students?

He'll probably want to know about other species, too... Anyone another species? Besides human? Any trolls, giants, werecats, hippogryffs, unicorns, or sphynxs? Ooh, and Veelas, he'll definitely want to know about Veelas-- about Veelas?

It's for science.

...I've been sold.



[[Always the last to know. XD I almost missed the Quidditch Player Auction! How terrible would that have been? Well I'm here now, and Osaka is chattel! Or is that cattle...? XD]]

My parents were unable to travel to Hogwarts to see me, unfortunately. But they did do the next best thing; they let me see their heads on fire!

Of course, they were quite confused by the process, as they had to go to the local witching supply store (luckily they knew my parents from when they took me to buy school supplies, or else they never would have shown such things to Muggles), and my parents were a bit worried about sticking their heads in a burning fire. The first five minutes were filled with "is it working? I can't tell, is it working? Is my hair burning? I think I see her. Ayumu-chan, can you hear me? I can't hear you. Are you speaking or just nodding? Can you hear me? Is my hair on fire?"

Eventually they got used to it, though, and were able to talk more comfortably. They asked me how school was going, if I was adjusting well, how Gregory-chan and Shokokawaru-chan were doing. They were proud of me for making the Quidditch team again. They said I brought great honor to the family by excelling in a sport they had never heard of. It is only unfortunate they cannot tell other Muggles of my accomplishments. But they said they were proud of me all the same.

They also asked about Azuma-kun. I had to remind them that he graduated last year. They asked how he was doing, and I did not know. I realized then I hadn't spoken to him in a long time. I really should contact him. But first I need to find out how....

• 5am practice, three hours, three times a week.



• 55 metres wideways, 152 metres long. Centre circle .7 metres. 73 metres from circle to goals.



• Mind your other Chasers. If a Chaser is in the Scoring Area, stay away!



• Practice Reverse Pass.



• Practice Parskoff Ploy.



• Practice Sloth Grip Roll (preferably without dying).



• Practice Hawkshead Attacking Formation (without panicking).



• Avoid Parkin's Pincers.



• Ignore Wollongong Shimmy.



• No Stooging. No Haversacking. No Blatching or Blagging (not even by accident). No Quaffle-Pocking. No Blurting.




• The Quaffle is my friend.

....Ok, I think I'm ready.



...Demo, where is the Quidditch pitch again?


[[All bulletpoint items are slightly faded, as she tried to make them private and failed miserably. XD]]

Gomen-nasai! I apologies for my rude behavior last week. My actions were most shameful. For myself and my family, I am so very sorry for anyone I offended.



[[Late post is late. For the cursing plot, being so innocent, Osaka would have been effected for sure. Unfortunately she knows no English curse words, so she relied on the few Japanese curses she knows. Mostly it was her throwing 'kuso" (damn/shit) in random parts of sentences, but once or twice she let loose with a "bakayarou" (asshole) and a "shinjimae" (Go to hell) even. Watch out for angry Osaka! XD]]

What is a "Death Eater"? Is it anything like a Thestral?

I don't want to die! But I want the 6th years to be able to graduate....



What if I don't graduate? Or if I get taller? Then can I live?



[[Osaka's odd statement explained here. Caser, you're evil. You're evil and smexy and I luvs you. ♥]]

7th year.



















....Wow.

Aah! It's almost Halloween again, isn't it? I should think of a costume! I must think of one myself too, and not let Chizuru-chan dress me up this year. It was nice of her to try and help, but the costume she gave me was... scary. What should I be? A pineapple? No, I've already done that. Oh my....




Oh! I know! It's perfect! Gooooooooooal!

Now I simply need to make it. I wonder if Ishida-senpai would help me...




[[Strike is filtered from Chizuru to spare her feelings. XD And this is Osaka's perfect costume idea. I don't know why she often seems to dress as food, or why I gravitate towards yellow when choosing colours for her. Things just seem to turn out that way.]]

Bread that turns people into plushies?



....Azuma-senpai must be back!!!



[[Poor Osaka. Azuma's old spell = false hope.

Osaka will spend the rest of the day running around school, picking up plushies to see who they are, and dejectedly throwing them over her shoulder when she sees they're not Azuma. Feel free to be thrown. XD]]

...I got an owl at breakfast this morning... it didn't bite me for once... I guess this explains why Azuma-senpai wasn't on the train....


( Letter )


I guess I should write back... but I don't know how to say what I'm thinking....

The new Divinations sensei is interesting. He asked some really funny questions. They've made me think a lot. Mostly about why he asked them.

I wonder why he wants to know about suicide. ...Maybe he sees us all committing a mass suicide in the future! We'll all form our own cult, dedicated to some planet we saw in Astronomy class, and then we'll all go to the Great Hall and drink poison pumpkin juice so our spirits can leave our bodies and travel up to the space ship that will take us to the planet Xolton to live in peace forever. That'd be kinda neat.




...I wonder if committing suicide will be part of the Final....

I am going soon to the airport to fly to London. Luckily I was able to get all my books ahead of time, so I do not need to stop by Diagon Alley. That would take up much time, and I cannot be late for the train. I'm also taking a lot of OWL level classes over again, so that was helpful in not having to buy new books. Gregory-chan is packed in my bag, and Shokokawaru-chan is in a box packed with dried ice and instructed to hold still as best he can, so he doesn't set off any scanners at the airport. He is going to be very cranky when we get to the train; I'll have to buy him many cockroach clusters to cheer him up.

Okaa-san and Otou-san were very proud of the OWLs I did earn. They said as a reward, if I'm still on the Quidditch team this year, I can get my own broom! That would help my playing a lot, not having to use the school brooms all the time. Now I just need to meet with the new team Captain and see if I'm still on the team....


[Private to Atobe]

Sir, I've been going through the pictures in the fan club library to find one for putting on things at the party; which one do you like?


( Pictures )



[[Presented in that order, they almost seem to tell a story, don't they? XD Ignore the website watermark, of course, and please don't tell them I borrowed their pics. It was not for my personal benefit. XD]]

I'm looking forward to returning to school again. I miss my kotatsu, and Gregory-chan misses playing in the gardens. Shokokawaru-chan misses being allowed outside at all; I've had to keep him indoors, since the neighbors would not really understand him. Although if he actually spoke they'd understand him, since he speaks the language around here, but a talking chocolate frog would be even more confusing than a non-talking one to my Muggle neighbors....

I can't wait to see the new Quidditch team. The captain graduated, I think, so we should be getting a new one this year. That should be interesting.

I wonder how Gir-san has been. Maybe he's exploded over the summer. I know how much he was looking forward to that....



[Filtered to Atobe]

Sir, do you think we should do something the first week of school to reintroduce people to the fanclub?

brilliant_osaka is happy.

You're a rosy-cheeked ray of f'ing sunshine 24/7. I bet you smile a lot and little things don't get you down. Must be nice. Fuchsia's definitely your color.

wanna know your lj's moodring color? enter your user name and hit the button. (discussion thread)

Ah, that's good to know.


[[Normally I don't do memes IC, but these results were just so hysterically spot-on, I just had to. XDDD]]

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!!!!!!!

I got my OWLs back! They're wonderful!

Astronomy	A
Defense Against The Dark Arts	P
Divination	E
Muggle Studies	E
Potions	P
Charms	P
History of Magic	T
Herbology	O
Care of Magical Creatures	A
Transfigurations	D

Isn't that wonderful?

Ohayo! I have not written in a while; my journal was packed away in my luggage, which accidentally ended up on a flight to Moscow. It took the airline nearly 2 weeks to find it and send it home. I wonder if it enjoyed it's trip....

I got to spend my birthday with Azuma-senpai! He invited me to Pantasia to watch him and Kanmuri-senpai work. They made so many breads, I lost track of them all! Then Azuma-senpai surprised me with a cake! It wasn't a total surprise, since people often get cakes on their birthday -- it would have been a bigger surprise if he'd given me a cake on Canadian Boxing Day -- but still, it was quite surprising. It was a good cake, too; it tasted like purple. That was probably from the purple icing.

I got some baker's chocolate to repair Shokokawaru-chan, as well. He lost a few fingers on the flight home. Apparently it's very hot in luggage transportation, even in Moscow. Shokokawaru-chan was very cross when he finally got home; for the longest time he refused to croak. It was only when I gave him some gummy worms that he cheered up.

Gregory-chan on the other hand was very happy to be home; he did not want to stay behind at school like he did over Winter break. Still, he misses his Ichigo-chichi. I should take him to visit Kurosaki-san and sensei soon. He will be most happy to see them.

My first day of tests went great! Sensei said I did fine. I thought I was doing pretty bad, 'cause I couldn't get the spell to work, but then sensei put his head in his hands and said "that's fine, just go." So I must have done better than I thought!

Hopefully the rest of the OWLs will go as well!

[Private]

Now I'm private!

[/private]

Now I'm not!

[Private]

Now I'm private!

[/private]

Now I'm not!

[Private]

Now I'm private!

[/private]

Now I'm not!

[Private]

Now I'm private!

[/private]

Now I'm not!


Hehehehehe!!!!

Hehehe. Hehehehehe.....
Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe......



[[Osaka is in the hall outside the library, giggling as she opens and closes her journal over and over again to make the fanfare and confetti go off. She was doing this in the library, but Madam Pince kicked her out. Feel free to be disturbed by her; it's a natural response.]]

I've been reading on Burdock Muldoon for Magic History class (not Jackson-sensei's old history class; the young history class). He's the guy from the Wizarding Council who said animals that walk on four legs were beasts, and animals that walk on their hind legs were beings. Does that mean kangaroos are people?

I tried to stay up last night to study, but I fell asleep at the kotatsu. It's just so warm and comfortable.... Shokokawaru-chan was resting on the table next to me. I guess he sat too close to the torch, because his foot melted, and now it looks like a spatula. It makes him hop funny. I will have to get Azuma-senpai to fix it when he is not busy. I suppose I could ask Kanmuri-senpai, but he is probably busy studying for his reptile exams....

It seems the alien menace has not yet come to harvest our organs. That's a relief; I need my organs for living.

...Still, I think I should keep wearing the hat....

It's almost the end of 5th year. I think I have a big test this year, too. Sumimasen, is 5th year the tests that are named after the lizards, or the ones named after the birds?


[[Osaka will be going about her regular prefect rounds... wearing a hat made of tinfoil. If you're gonna go crazy, go with classic crazy. XD]]

My nekoness is gone. But, I thought that would only happen if I lost my-- if I wasn't a-- I thought that wouldn't happen.

Everyone else's is gone too! This does not make sense; for such a large shift in the social population, unless....





AAAAHHHH!!! WE'VE ALL BEEN ABDUCTED IN OUR SLEEP AND PROBED BY ALIENS! IT'S THE ONLY LOGICAL EXPLAINATION!!!!!

Everyone in my dorm has been nekofied. It's kinda funny. And earlier, I had the urge to climb under my kotatsu and take a nap. Completely. Usually I only get halfway under my kotatsu when I take naps.

[Private (So easily hackable it's ridiculous)]

Light-kun explained why some people are changing and others aren't. It's surprising how many students didn't change. I thought... that sort of thing, was only for adults who were married. And hentais.

Sometimes, my friends' older siblings would gossip about which students in their high school had... lost their ears. But it was always a very shocking thing. If half the school had lost their ears, I think my friends' siblings would have died.

I guess it's Western culture; these sort of things aren't as big a deal here. It's kinda scary. I'm not sure I'm ready to live in such a fast-paced culture. I thought Osaka was fast-paced for me. And Tokyo.

At least all the other girls in my dorm are still... nekos too. At least I'm not alone.

[/private]


Edit: Waaah!!! Mut is trying to kill me! Gomennasai! I don't want to die!

[New mood: Distressed]

..Arigatou Haruko-chan... when you wake up.... o_o;


[[Why Osaka is was a marked woman. XD]]

I have neko ears again! And a tail!

I forgot how fun having a tail was....

I made a new friend! I don't know why I never met him before, but he looks rather old for a student; perhaps he is a new teacher? He's very interesting, though!

And he brings up a good point; how is a raven like a writing desk?

Waah! Azuma-senpai has passed out in the hallway! I cannot carry him, and he cannot stay here; it's not safe! Someone could step on him! Please, someone come help him!


[[Osaka will be sitting beside Azuma, holding his head in her lap so it's not on the cold hard floor, and spazzing and yelling "do not step on senpai!" anytime anyone comes within 10 feet of him (as if they can't see the person lying sprawled on the floor XD).]]

I had the most wonderful dream! I was me, but a Muggle, only I was here at Hogwarts. I didn't remember any of it, though, about being a witch or any of my friends. And somehow I knew that I was sleeping, so I wanted to find signs of good luck. First I found a room full of hawks, and then the house elves were Hobbits and gave me an eggplant. I couldn't find Mt. Fuji, but then Azuma-senpai came and gave it to me. (I didn't know him, though, and thought he was a girl. XD) He gave me the mountain to put things in. I guess that means Azuma-senpai brings me good luck? :)

I should have really good luck for the rest of the year. Which is good, too, because OWLs should be coming up soon....

I have found Mt. Fuji! A girl from Tokyo gave it to me! It's smaller than I remember, but it's here, and it's edible! That's got to be bonus good luck, right?

So I've found everything! Now all I have to do is wake up. Maybe if I dreamed about sleeping....

I found an eggplant! I was wandering in a hall, and I found a picture of some food. There was an eggplant-shaped plant in the picture, only green, and when I touched it, the picture swung open and I was in the Shire! There were lots of little Hobbits, only they didn't look very healthy, probably because they spend all their time in the Shire kitchen. They asked me what they could get me, and I asked if they had an eggplant. Within minutes they brought me dozens of types of eggplant! Fresh ones, sliced, breaded Italian, sandwiches.... That has to be lots of good luck!

They didn't know where to find Mt. Fuji, though. I must find it soon. It seems I have been asleep for days, so I will probably wake up very soon.

I haven't found the eggplant yet, but I found a room with a lot of hawks. That's got to be good luck, right?

Now I just need to find the eggplant and Mt. Fuji before I wake up....


[[She still thinks it's a dream. Eventually she'll find the kitchen and her eggplant. All she still needs is Mt. Fuji. Any ideas? XD]]

Oh dear. Is it New Years again already?

I suppose I must find the eggplant and the hawk at Mt. Fuji before the alarm goes off....

Umm... I went out to practice for Quidditch, and....

People may not want to go out to the Quidditch pitch any time soon.


[[What's going on on the Quidditch pitch. XD (That was a fun one to Google, too. If the FBI ever checks my internet records, they'll have a field day with that one alone....)]]

...I still don't get it. Why would you play tricks on people?

And why is there a fish on my back?


[[According to this article, only about 1/4th of Japanese people really know about April Fools', so Osaka is unfamiliar with the custom. XD]]

It seems I am stuck to someone again. I hope he does not bite me like Envy-san did.

Haruko-san said we were a couple, but being stuck together does not make us a real couple. Right?

I got many nice gifts for White Day. Atobe-senpai gave me a box of candy. Gai-senpai sent me one too. Kanmuri-senpai sent me some white roses. They're very beautiful. Loki-kun gave me a white rose too. And someone sent flowers to my dorm, but they forgot to sign them.... This was a very good White Day.

I still haven't heard from Azuma-senpai... I don't think he sent the flowers. Flowers are not really his style. I wonder if he forgot....

[Private (Hackable)]

Matt-senpai pointed out that tomorrow is White Day. I had not remembered.

I wonder if I will get any presents. I really hope Kazuma-san remembers White Day....

I heard it was your birthday, Light-kun. I got you a present. I saw it and it reminded me of the kind of thing you like....


[[Osaka got Light a goat plushie. ....Yeah. I'm not sure if she's saying Light like plushies, or if she's calling Kanda a goat.... Probably the second one....]]

....I do not like invisible animals. Especially ones that bleed on you.


[[Osaka: not a fan of thestrals. Even though they seem to like her. XD]]

....I think we're going to die....


[[Osaka's on Marik's field trip. And scared. XD]]

Oh my....

[Private (Easily hackable)]

What have I done? I said all those things... I made a fool of myself. I've shamed my family and my house. What was wrong with me?

Melllo-senpai will never speak to me again, and I don't blame him. Matt-senpai probably hates me, after the way I tried to use him. And Kazuma-san....

Kazuma-san.. he seemed so sad the other day. I barely noticed. How could I be so distracted?

I am so ashamed. How can I ever show my face around school again?


[[Osaka will be avoiding Mello like she owes him money. XDDD]]

Mello-san? Where have you gone? Why did you leave? Was I boring you?

I wanted to talk to you some more. You said you'd explain to me why oranges are called oranges, but lemons are not called yellows, or limes called greens.

Have I upset you somehow? Did I offend you? Gomen nasai, I am sorry. I can do better, I promise. My okaasan told me all the things a girl must know in order to be a good wife. I can make you happy! Just tell me what to do!

I am sorry if I am pressuring you, and I do not want you to feel trapped. I just want to be with you because... I... daisuki yanen!



[["diasuki yanen" is Kansai dialect for "I really like you", which by Japanese standards is equivalent to "I love you". She's reached the grand finale of the love potion. She's uncharacteristically despondent, and is emoing all through classes. XD]]

Mello-san! Let's get together to hang out!

I'll bring Shokokawaru-chan!

[Private (Easily Hackable except to Mello)]

Other girls have developed feelings for Mello-san too. This is understandable, as he is a very desirable person. But the other girls have things I don't have, and I worry they will ruin my chances with Mello-san.

I cannot "talk dirty" like Haruko-chan, or do deviant physical acts like Miranda-chan. I am not pretty like Himawari-chan. I cannot compete in these categories.

I must find something that only I can offer Mello-san! That is the only way to win his heart!

Matt-senpai can help me; we have made great progress in becoming friends. Already he does not call me an idiot! If I can become closer to Matt-senpai, I will be able to win favour with Mello-san!

I think it will be fun. Matt-senpai is obviously a very nice person, or else he would not be friends with someone as great at Mello-san. I will make sure Matt-senpai and I get along wonderfully. That should make Mello-san happy!


Oh dear; my pink hair has disappeared. I hope Mello-san likes brown hair....

[/private]



Mello-san! Have you been having fun with your good friend Matt-senpai? :)

Has anyone seen Mello-kun? I must find him! I have something very important to talk to him about.

Please? Where is he?


[[Osaka's hair color is going to last an extra day, 'cause she's little, so potions have a stronger effect on her. And 'cause I like it. XD]]

Valentine's Day is a wonderful day!

Normally back home boys do not give things to girls in Valentine's Day, but Kazu-- Azuma-senpai gave me the most wonderful gift of all: a giant chocolate frog! And he speaks ! He calls me "okaachan"! ♥ I have named him Shokokawaru-chan. He is the best chocolate frog ever! ♥

Oh, and other people gave me many wonderful gifts, too. Arigatou everyone.

Also, I have pink hair now! I understand now how Kanmuri-senpai feels all the time. It is an interesting feeling.

....I'm going to go see if Shokokawaru-chan wants anything to eat!


[[Kao-chan, I hope you don't mind, but I went ahead with the gift exchange even though we didn't have time to log it. If that's not ok let me know.

Osaka now has a new pet; a giant talking chocolate frog. He makes all the sounds frogs make (croaks and such), as well as speaks Japanese. He doesn't have a whole lot to say, though, so he won't talk constantly. XD Osaka will be taking him with her to all her classes, carrying him in both arms and setting him on the desk/table during class/meals. He won't wander far from Osaka, though he'll move around the table a bit, investigating stuff, making himself comfortable, and doing that thing frogs do where they rub their face with their back legs. (That's the coolest thing. XD) He'll investigate other people and croak at them and stuff too. Feel free to say 'hi'. XD]]